A lonely life gradually starts feeling like there is no one for you; the people around you are seriously dating or married and this makes you nervous because it doesn’t seem like there is anyone there for you. You can’t stop wanting a relationship! When you look at yourself, life isn’t getting better, life is unbearable, you feel your life is meaningless with constant breakdown. You are empty and want to have someone. You need that comfort and acceptance which you secretly yearn for and this often affects your self-confidence and security. But, how can you stop wanting what is seeming impossible to find? I’ll tell you…
First and foremost,
1. Stop being hard on yourself
Truth is, we are wired to seek for what we feel will bring pleasure and most times the attention to the internet, TV programs, books, or individuals who communicate that being in a relationship equates with great satisfaction and happiness is how you begin to draw thought patterns base on that, it is 100% wrong. Love and relationship can be both beautiful and destructive and being in love and in a relationship can make one lose freedom.
You need to understand that the ideal life does not depend on what someone wrote as a script for a movie or what an author writes in his book, these generally do not exist and everybody must not live according to their views, you have to be happy and understand that you are living an ideal life. More importantly, there is no such thing as a perfect way to live life. This is one of the mix-ups too, so don’t mistakenly believe every perfect life must be with a relationship. At the moment when you feel unappreciated, the outside world generally responds to how you feel, so every second you want to move around and participate in a meaningful way you likely get discouraged.
2. Know why you want a relationship
Make sure that your reasons for wanting to be in a relationship so badly do not come from needs like validation or pressure from family and friends trying to put pressure on you to believe that this is all you want to be happy and complete in life. Failing to know that there is a difference between wanting to get love and desiring to share the love. When you only want to get love, being taken care of emotionally, financially, and sexually implies you are abandoning yourself and have not learned to love and value yourself and you need someone who can help you do so. Mehn, people suck when you give them power. Learn to take responsibility for doing the inner work of accepting who you are by practicing deep self-care mediation and enlightening yourself with self-love tips.
3. Immerse in meaningful daily activities
Experts agree that happiness depends on how you use your energy, time, and mindset in and out of living. A happy life is a combination of meaningful activities, social support, and mindfulness. For example, you might feel miserable sitting in the front row at an award night with Rihanna because you are so obsessed with how everyone looks and comparing yourself with everyone in the room.
You need to begin to acknowledge your worth and accept who you are and, what your identity is, what you do and how it is done, being aware that not all your thoughts are facts instead of deciding to admit something painful, see the positives, and focus only on them.